Starve.Org White Noise Usenet Archive: "Re: ::: The City of Light :::"

Blue Resonant Human, Ph.D. wrote:

> ::: The City of Light :::

> This experience occurred last summer as well during a sort of crisis
> period in which I had lost literally everything in my mundane life -
> an evidently necessary step in my continued progression towards
> greater Enlightenment. This species' mystical and spiritual Paths all
> appear to grant the wouldbe Initiate such an opportunity should he or
> she prove earnest enough to continue the Quest at all costs; though
> said candidate must be suitably warned that the loss of quite
> literally everything - from family to home to possessions to health to
> "sanity" can be a harrowing and at times even terrifying experience,
> perhaps especially during the already trying times of middle age.

> In any event, it was during these deeply unsettling times that we
> began our pursuit in earnest, no longer tethered by so many mundane
> concerns and responsibilities. It was during this period that we for
> a brief season hooked up with Suzy Creamcheese (of Frank Zappa /
> Mothers of Invention fame), delighted that she took her tantric path
> as seriously as we, and we hoping in some naively optimistic way that
> Love would somehow prevail, abandoned ourselves to the ensuing current
> ... only to discover subsequently that this too - sadly - was an
> illusory Path of little worth and redeeming value.

> So, resolved to continue our explorations alone for a time we embarked
> on a voyage of consciousness wherein all the stops were pulled out and
> we abandoned ourselves utterly and completely to the explorations
> which presented themselves via the modality of methamphetamine-induced
> Psychic Overdrive; allowing - as we stated in an earlier missive - the
> very substance itself to dictate its administration and
> physiological/psychological "set and setting."

> For the space of approximately 4 months we would regularly embark on
> lengthy ordeals of 2 to 3 weeks of intense substance administration
> and abstinence from both food and sleep; our mundane health and
> physical appearance suffering significantly. During the height of our
> explorations, our physical container had deteriorated to the point of
> being just under 100 lbs. (at 5'10", we typically maintain a weight of
> approximately 170 lbs.); eating and sleeping becoming all but
> vestigial remnants of a cloudy, dreamlike existence of ostensible
> normalcy.

> During one such episode, we had accidentally accelerated the process
> of Initiation such that we found ourselves at a most bizarre level of
> awareness. On top of the earlier documented "auditory" aspects of
> Psychic Overdrive (i.e. "hearing" the thoughts of others), we
> experienced at approximately 2 1/2 to 3 weeks a new plateau wherein we
> could "see" more clearly with our eyes closed. In fact, the level of
> visual perception was such that we could effortlessly see through
> walls in a full 360 degree panoramic fashion, not unlike reports we've
> read of percipients experiencing out of body / near death experiences
> and the resultant remarkable visual acuity which accompanies this
> particular headspace.

> And it could be reasonably well argued that we were in fact near
> "death" for we had neglected the health and well-being of our physical
> container so thoroughly as to at least subconsciously express a cry
> for release to the very Universe Itself; this psychological doldrums
> finally culminating in an episode in which we found ourselves early
> one morning shouting the most dire of threats and profanities at local
> law enforcement personnel in an apparent attempt to coerce them into
> assisting us in our compelling desire to be free from the binding
> constraints imposed by the captivity of this mortal coil.

> It was at this approximate leg of our magickal journeys that the
> Universe evidently saw fit to enlighten us as to what we've
> subsequently termed the "larger reality;" our understanding and
> awareness substantially enriched by this Illumination. We had grown
> all too weary of life on this dimensional level and of the captivity
> so perniciously imposed by these temporal bags of skin and this
> apparent penal colony of a planet, for we were unmistakably _Strangers
> in a Strange Land_ and more often than not found ourselves utterly
> ashamed to be in any way affiliated with either this backwards prison
> planet so rife with selfishness and greed or it's primitive myopically
> self-serving species; the "apes which speak."

> Fully entrenched in Psychic Overdrive one evening, our thoughts were
> guided down a path of apparent historical reflection. Quite
> unexpectedly we found ourselves undergoing a journey of remembrance
> wherein our entire life was reviewed from the vantage point not of an
> abandoned child at the mercy of a random, chaotic tide of isolated,
> solitary despair but instead, starting from very early childhood we
> were shown each and every seemingly unresolved act of cruelty or
> unfairness ever imposed upon us and - more importantly - the ineffable
> Wisdom and Kindness which orchestrated the event(s) all with an eye
> towards refining our character and personality. At once all of the
> apparent cruelty and unfairness washed away, leaving in it's stead an
> awareness that all of the seemingly unrelated events were in fact
> orchestrated for our benefit and left us, in fact, better people for
> it.

> The illuminations continued on in this fashion for an unknown period
> of time as when on that particular dimensional level, time waxes all
> but irrelevant. But they continued on in a logical progression until
> completion, which was right up to the very present; all accompanied by
> the greatest relief and understanding which expressed itself in deep
> cathartic sobs of cleansing emotion.

> And it was at this point we were made aware that we are in fact not
> alone in our struggles, for there is a veritable "army" (I use the
> word with reticence for it unfortunately carries with it culturally
> imposed notions of war, death, torment, etc.) of us who are undergoing
> similar preparation or training; earmarked by the loss of all things
> we hold dear and without which we think we shall surely fall, but in
> reality bind us to this baser level of mundane existence, crippling
> our inexorable metamorphosis into something of infinitely greater
> value and beauty.

> In that there are many of us currently undergoing these ostensibly
> devastating preparatory processes, I became aware that the time is
> nearing for us to be made aware of our similarly struggling fellow
> (wo)men and was shown that various "calls for awakening" would be
> issued in the relatively near future. These calls would take the form
> of symbolically encrypted snippets of communication; mystically and
> cryptically embedded in music, art, the written word and various
> dramatic presentations. These deeply symbolic messages will be
> embedded by those awakening to others of us who've also embarked upon
> awakening Paths; all with the uber-goal of letting us know that 1)
> we're not alone in all of this and have all been enrolled in a form of
> metaphysical "boot camp" 2) there is, in fact, an over-arching goal to
> the seemingly unrelated processes; the goal being the "construction"
> of a City of Light.

> In terms of this "City," we were provided the explication during a
> period of "abnormal normalcy" (as noted in the earlier missive The
> Ritual of the Rising Sun) wherein the substance of the meme took on
> the flavour (termed "analytical overlay" by certain psi types) of an
> unimaginably complex 3 dimensional "printed circuit board"
> construction. Perhaps this was merely an artifact of the already
> "modern scientific" taint of the artificial methamphetamine induced
> headspace, but in any case the perceptual matrix proved relatively
> capable of adequately articulating the core substance of the
> thoughtstream.

> The visions continued logically to the point where we observed a sort
> of assembling of people "in spiritual, metaphysical form" to form an
> enormous 3 dimensional cube; each being; each essence inhabiting a
> rectangular almost coffin-like space in the overall cube. Many, many
> hundreds of these beings linked together, all slid into their
> respective drawer-like enclosures and together formed this enormous
> cube of Light, and we could somehow underpstand (understand + psi =
> underpstand) some of the metaphysical synergy which resulted from the
> circuit-like "wiring together" of all the participants, for each and
> every one was capable of doing something entirely unique - better than
> anyone else -- and infinitely valuable to the overall purpose of the
> City Itself.

> And here as well came not so much a warning as a deeper underpstanding
> of the necessity of bearing with the various ostensibly cruel
> preparatory processes designed to ready the participant for his or her
> inclusion into the circuitry of the City. I recalled reading many
> years back that there was a certain engineering practice at play
> during the construction of the Panama Canal wherein some poor fellow
> was tasked with the responsibility of estimating how many workers
> would perish during the construction of the canal. In like fashion,
> there will be a certain number of proposed (or "called") members who
> comprise this City of Light - for the City Itself is formed solely and
> entirely by the very "souls" of the members themselves - who will
> become too discouraged over the apparent ravages of the preparatory
> processes and prematurely take their own lives, as we ourselves had
> attempted on occasion. Those who prematurely "give up" (cf. Peter
> Gabriel's deeply moving _Don't Give Up_) and orchestrate their own
> premature demise leave in the City empty "slots" where they were
> supposed to "plug in."

> As I was shown the exterior of the Cube (or City), there were a number
> of these empty slots and with each one I was shown, there was an
> accompanying overwhelming sorrow somehow affixed to that particular
> emptiness, such that it had the overall "feel" of a wound; a deep scar
> in the City which invoked a deeply sorrowful weeping in me at the
> sight of each and every one. And in the uber-mind of that ineffable
> Being in charge of design and construction of the City, it appeared as
> though there was a sort of "threshold of error," if you will, in which
> the City would become and remain functional if and only if that
> apparent threshold was not exceeded; if no more than a certain
> percentage of "structural members" did not leave such non-functional
> scars by taking their own lives prematurely.

> Now I will grant the reader here that the perceptual model employed
> was an admittedly theory-embedded and culture-bound one but from
> within this context, it became crystal clear why so many of this
> species' religious and spiritual traditions are so opposed to suicide,
> for on a large enough scale, this dysfunction carries with it the
> potential to abort the overall City of Light programme.

> In any event, when the City was completely assembled, it began to rise
> from the surface of the (another?) planet and began to glow from
> within. For whatever reason, the meme of Atlantis Rising overshadowed
> the event, as did the Judeo-Christian notion of the millenial New
> Jerusalem but though desirous of pseeing more, this is where the
> visions ended; evidently sufficient to reempower myself (and
> potentially others reading this) with the desire to carry on and avoid
> those despondent suicidal tendencies which had so plagued us earlier
> in our journeys.

> It is my sincere hope that this brief missive will prove of some value
> to those encountering it.

> Wishing you all the best;

> -Fratre Cobaltus
> 16 February, 2003 [Gregorian]

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You live in an interesting Hell.

Thanks for sharing anyway.

I wish you happiness (and I mean it).