Source: Page 89 of White Noise Keywords: "one's," "old," "other," "nothing"

From: Lazarhat <lazarhat@burnt_crusty_bits_yahoo.com> Subject: Re: The Old Zendoid's Home Date: 4 Jul 2005 Newsgroups: alt.buddha.short.fat.guy

> "Sanford Manley" <manle...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message > news:Mp_xe.23449$Tt.7770@bignews3.bellsouth.net... >>>>> Ned: >>>>> Mmm... Sounds good. How will we kill the old and useless ones? >>> Xin: >>>> "In recognition of the outstanding life you have led, >>>> here is all the morphine you could possibly want!" >>> Oh excellent! I read the above to Mary and she said, >>> "Pillows?" >> You know, there are times when I would be most >> happy to die...to take some does of some gentle >> poison with some pain killer and surrounded by >> friends, reminisce until I fall asleep and die. >> This is not a desire for suicide which I see as >> a rejection of life, this is a desire for rest, for >> an end to striving, to cast off all the tasks and >> requirements and expectations. Its is a resignation >> from life rather than anything else. >> There are times that I do not see the point of >> my life...there is no real purpose...nothing that >> really needs to be done except what is necessary >> to maintain life. > Yes. Nature is aimless. There is no goal. >> Its then becomes like driving >> back and forth between two gas stations: >> "Where are you going?" >> "To go get gas." >> That is there is no other purpose than to continue >> to travel so that you can continue to travel. >> Living for no other reason, but for one's own >> self, is pointless because of this. Sure, there >> are many things I could conceivably do, but >> I am not really needed anywhere. The world >> would spin quite nicely without me, to think >> otherwise is the greatest folly. Many of the >> things that we do to "better the world" really >> don't accomplish anything. Many people >> really do these things to impress themselves >> or others. >> I am very tired. Physically tired, philosophically >> tired, spiritually tired, emotionally tired. > Congratulations. > I've never understood how people can have these > realizations, and fail to see them in a positive > light. Or rather, having gotten these realizations, > why do so many people consistently see them in a > negative light? > This is good stuff: > "I do not see the point of my life... > there is no real purpose... > nothing that really needs to be done except what is > necessary to maintain life. > Living for no other reason, but for one's own self, > is pointless because of this. > I am not really needed anywhere. The world would spin > quite nicely without me, > Many of the things that we do to "better the world" > really don't accomplish anything." > This is the void. This is the abyss. You can look > into this, and keep looking into this, and look deeper > and deeper and deeper into it, and never find a bottom > to it. It goes on without end. There is no limit to > it. You can fall into this and keep falling forever. > What you can't do, imo, is come to a conclusion from > it. And that is where everyone, imo, screws up when > they get these realizations. > I don't really know how to express this. But if you > truly KNOW the stuff you've said above, you can't roll > it all into a ball and say, THEREFORE... > Because if all of the above is true, then there is > no "therefore". You can't get a "therefore" out of it > if there really is no point, and no purpose, and nothing > that needs to be done, and no reason, and no need to live, > and no accomplishment. > Why people don't see this as bags and bags of shit that > has just rolled off their back I'll never understand... > Ned The next idea is to pierce into and through that void.... that abyss. Which means -- "You know what? I don't need a 'therefore'. Nothing has changed, yet everything has changed. Life goes on." then move along to the next moment. It's extraordinary how ordinary the exact moment of realization and subsequent dropping manifests. -- Dissent is the highest form of patriotism. -Thomas Jefferson

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